yeesh

bad blogger, me!  

life's been jam-packed.  soooo, so, so busy with this new(ish) job.  not only have the hours been long, but the projects i'm working on, hell ... never mind the projects ... everything i do here, whether it's new or not, is an unpredictable experience.  i'm learning a lot, and my resume will be awesome after doing this, so i'm happy with it all in general.  it just doesn't leave me with a lot of fabulous blog fodder.  

shit!  this beer tastes like butter!  we got a whole box of bum beer.  this is truly sad.

360 hours.

frickin' monsoon

the problem is bad, so bad.  there are probably 20 towels sopping up the leaks at any given time, and they are ALL soaked within an hour.  we are using every bucket and bowl/pot/container in the house to catch the water.  the landlord doesn't give a shit.  there's mold growing in the bedroom and living room.  an electrical outlet has come detached from the wall, directly underneath the leaks, and is starting to look like a dangerous situation.  ... and she still doesn't give a shit.  it's unbelievable.  ...  and come the end of next month, we're gonna have to give her a lump payment for the NEXT NINE MONTHS of rent.  makes me happy!

p.s.

india was showing drugstore cowboy on tv today.  it was so great seeing portland on the tiny screen ... all the way over here!  

only 49 days!  

schoolboy down

today i was coming home from work in a rickshaw.  we were stopped at an intersection for a while, just up the street from a school.  there was a group of schoolboys ... maybe 8-10 years old ... about 5 of them, walking along next to the rick.  when we stopped, one of them looked in, stared me right in the eye and without hesitation, THREW WITH GREAT FORCE something that i think was a fig at my arm!  that thing was HARD!  it smarted!  badly!  and i was instantly bruised.  ... it was one of those occasions that before i could even register what had happened, i was PISSED!  i poked my head out of the rick and screeeeeamed.  the rickshaw driver was really embarrassed.  the people in the cars next to us were intrigued.  crazy white lady screaming and cursing at small schoolboys.  grrr.  the little effers.  i'm still mad.  i've half a mind to stop at the school tomorrow, on my way to work and lay down the law with the headmaster.

us girls came up with a new word the other night.  ...  bomday.  it describes a bad bombay day.  a bomday.  we all have them.

somehow, the monsoon'll kill ya!

the maid came to work on friday looking ROUGH.  i asked her about it, and she nonchalantly told me she had a fever and diarrhea.  i couldn't believe she came to work!  i was like, 'well, you can't be cooking our food!  go home and rest."  she was shocked.  'madam, no cooking?  but why?"  it was completely a foreign concept to her that with a fever, she might be contagious.  she didn't even seem to know what i meant by the word contagious.  ug.  well, she called last night and is still sick.  she has malaria.  ick.  poor thing.  she'll be back to work on wednesday, hopefully.  the house is filthy!

major monsoon hazard number 2, after mosquitos ... potholes.  they're GIGANTIC.  the roads are poorly constructed to begin with (and lots of them are unpaved), and when it rains, they just fall apart.  it's impossible to judge how deep the holes are once they're filled with rain, so traffic becomes even more erratic, with everyone trying to avoid the holes.  i read in the newspaper yesterday that a 5-year old girl died after falling out of a rickshaw.  it hit a pothole, the kid flew off her dad's lap, hit her head on the sidewalk, and died of injuries in the hospital.  yeesh.

today

so two strange(ish) things happened today.

thing number one is that a man, very well-groomed and professionally dressed, came into the store today and very seriously asked if he could try on bras.  the girls were HORRIFIED and disgustedly told him to leave.  i don't know ... in the last town i lived in, this is not such a strange thing.  apparently it is here.

thing number two shocked the hell out of me.  i don't know why, but it did.  a nigerian couple came in, looking for red lingerie.  they didn't find what they wanted, so they left.  after they walked out, one of the salesgirls looked at me and said very seriously, 'what were the gorillas looking for?'  !!!!!!!!!!!!  now, THIS was strange to me.  and yes, i yelled at her. 

WTF?!  yikes.

my title

i spent the day in the store today because the manager took the day off.  and i agreed that while the boss is gone, i'd keep a close eye on the store, which includes being there when the manager isn't.  not much super exciting happens from day to day there.  you know, the a.c. breaks, the repairman is called, and as these things go, he refuses to come out and fix it because it's raining. when he comes the next day, it's almost after hours and the entire staff has literally melted into puddles on the floor.  it's so hot.  customers have walked in and spun around and walked right out.  and the only way to get him to do the job the same day (or day after) is to yell and scream.  or you see a cockroach so you call the pest control company and ask the man to come spray for roaches.  he can't come immediately because, well, it's raining and it's too much to make it out to the store.  but he comes the next day, which is great.  except when he gets there, he tells you that he doesn't spray for roaches.  all HE does is check for rats.  huh?  you have no rat problem, and you specifically called for roach spraying.  and in the end, it's the usual fight at an elevated volume about paying the guy for a service you didn't ask for, didn't need, and refused.  come up with an equally silly story for the accountant, the ad agent you've hired, the factory, the box maker, the website/internet guy, and even the guy who owns a biz up the street who has agreed to do a promotional 'scheme' (as they call them here) with you, but refuses to have any say in the design of the promotional material or pay for his half of the same... throw any 5 of these guys into your day, then get them to actually do what 1) you want them to do, 2) they've agreed to do, 3) do it in the agreed upon timeframe and price range, and 4) communicate this all in a foreign language (english) ... and you'll understand my new job.  

the super sweet, meek, mild, timid, soft-spoken salesgirls have started calling me 'the don.'  it's not entirely inappropriate.

i forgot about this one from jodhpur ... i like it

let's celebrate!

today marks the 1 week AND A DAY of me being employed ... making it the LONGEST i've lasted in a job in india!!!  woohoo!  and i have no plans of quitting.

persistence paid off, and the lingerie job finally came through.

i'm late ... so i'll tell you more about it later ... but for now, please feel free to drown yourself in champagne in my honor.

rain gear

so with the almost constant downpours and very poor drainage systems, it is totally conceivable that on any given day you might find yourself spending an afternoon wading through knee- to chest-high water to get home. the city is set up with only 1 or 2 possible routes taking you from any point A to point B, so if a street is flooded and your transportation can't travel it, you often have to just park the vehicle and wade home ... regardless of how far away you are! it's actually somewhat dangerous at times. what this means (among other things) is that to be prepared, one must have rain gear because it is just not a good idea to stay indoors ... for 3 straight months. karilyn headed to shopper's stop (department store) in search of rain gear. we figured they'd have it; they sell clothing, home furnishings, 'art,' books ... everything you might possibly need besides food. we wandered around for a while, looking in the clothing section and then moving on to the accessories corner. nothing. so we decided to ask...

us: excuse me, where do you keep the rain gear?
salesguy: it's here next to you, madam.
us: this is men's rain gear. where is the women's rain gear?
salesguy looking very confused: women's rain gear? no.
us: what do you mean, no?!
salesguy: no women's rain gear.
us: oh, you sold out?
salesguy: no, madam.
us: is it maybe at another store?
salesguy: no, madam.
us, starting to fume: so you don't sell any rain gear for women?!
salesguy: no, madam.
us, so thoroughly annoyed with the big i: what, don't women get wet in the rain?
salesguy, completely serious: no, madam.

WTF?!